It is not my goal to fail. Let’s get that clear from the start. This is not a blog about personal sabotage. I want to be successful and wealthy. I want to be joyful and healthy.
The amplified Bible says in John 10:10:
The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].
Up until a few months ago, and take into consideration that I am 37 years old, I thought John 10:10 meant that God was going to hand me stuff: a great writing career, a wonderful husband, a beautiful home… service opportunities that require no sweat or sacrifice.
For all those years, I thought God would hand my life to me. I’d wake up one day, sit down at my computer and find myself speed-typing a divinely inspired book. And it would flow out whole and perfect, complete and ready for publication.
Later the same week, with my newly written manuscript tucked beneath my arm, I’d miraculously collide with an Idris Elba look-a-like, who would then bend down on one knee and present me with an embarrassingly large engagement ring.
That’s what I thought the promise of an abundant life meant, that at the right time, I’d instantly be handed everything I ever wanted without any effort on my part. All I had to do was wait. And believe me, I wasn’t doing very good at waiting.
But that isn’t God’s plan. God is the one waiting, and God is waiting for works, my works.
Taking steps toward my goal is scary. I can make a mistake. I can work and work and things may not happen the way I want them to. I can work and work and still fail.
But I can’t let that stop me anymore.
Over the next year, I am going to try. I am going to reach for the desires of my heart, after all, they’ve been given to me. (Delight yourself in the Lord, And He will give you the desires and petitions of your heart, Psalm 37:4.)I am going to move forward even if I stumble a little bit. (Because He’s able to keep me from falling, and I don’t have to worry.) Even if it looks like I’ve failed. Even if everyone thinks I’ve failed. Even if they retweet and repost and blog about how I’ve failed, I’m going to move forward.
Well, at least that’s the plan.